16. When the Healing Hurts: Suicidal Thoughts, Sex Addiction & the Fight for Connection

In this vulnerable episode, we pick up our story in September 2023—a month marked by emotional extremes, deep spiritual wrestling, and pivotal moments in our healing journey after betrayal trauma.

Avonlea opens up about her darkest night—grappling with suicidal thoughts and the heavy weight of relational trauma. Josh shares what early recovery and international travel were like while battling sex addiction and learning to build real emotional connection for the first time.

Together, we discuss:

• Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong
• Struggles with communication and the FASTT check-in tool (from Stop Sex Addiction)
• The emotional toll of sexual betrayal and fears around sexual reintegration
• How God’s truth and professional support pulled us through
• Powerful insights from books like The Betrayal Bind, The Great Sex Rescue, and Calling in the One

This episode is for anyone navigating the depths of trauma recovery, addiction healing, or the lonely places where faith, love, and despair collide. Our prayer is that you feel seen and supported—and know that you are never walking this road alone.

 🙏 We pray for you daily—your healing matters.

📖 Resources: 

SAMHSA National Helpline: Call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for confidential treatment referral and information about mental and/or substance use disorders. This line is available 24/7 in English and Spanish.

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 for free and confidential support for people in suicidal or emotional distress. This hotline is available 24/7.